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Hebonics

Thanks, Ira, for continuing to send me funny stuff from New York. Although, its Pennsylvania these days, isn't it?



NEW YORK - The New York City school board has
officially declared Jewish English - now dubbed Hebonics - as a
second language. Backers of the move say the city's School
District is the first in the state to recognize Hebonics as a
valid language and significant attribute of New York culture.

According to Howard Schollman, linguistics professor at New
York University and renowned Hebonics scholar, the sentence
structure of Hebonics derives from middle and eastern European
language patterns, as well as Yiddish.
Prof. Schollman explains, "In Hebonics, the response to any
question is usually another question-plus a complaint that
is implied or stated. Thus 'How are you?' may be answered,
'How should I be, with my feet?'"
Schollman says that Hebonics is a superb linguistic vehicle
for expressing sarcasm or skepticism. An example is the
repetition of a word with "sh" or "shm" at the beginning:
"Mountains, shmountains. Stay away. You want a nosebleed?"

Another Hebonics pattern is moving the subject of a sentence to
the end, with its pronoun at the beginning:
"It's beautiful, that dress."

Schollman says one also sees the Hebonics verb moved to the
end of the sentence. Thus the response to a remark such as
'He's slow as a turtle,' could be: "Turtle, shmurtle! Like
a fly in Vaseline he walks."

Schollman provided the following examples from his textbook,
Switched-On Hebonics.

Question: "What time is it?"
English answer: "Sorry, I don't know."
Hebonic answer: "What am I, a clock?"

Remark: "I hope things turn out okay."
English response: "Thanks."
Hebonic response: "I should BE so lucky!"

Remark: "Hurry up. Dinner's ready."
English response: "Be right there."
Hebonic response: "Alright already, I'm coming. What's with
the 'hurry' business? Is there a fire?"

( More Hebonics ahead! )

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I apparently am what love_alone wants to be.... hrmmmm


( quiz )