Cheeky and presumptuous... all at the same time!

Requests.... desires... hopes...




1)Does anyone have a copy of the music program Finale who would be willing to, um, burn for me?




2)Does anyone have an old digital camera (not TOO old, but... old enough you want to get rid of it) that you would be interested in selling me for, like, $50?

Good stuff!

So I don't know if its the meds I've been on for the last six weeks, or if its just because my stress level is finally below-manageable, or because of all the time I've had to myself (definitely linked to the stress level), or if its because it is finally fantastic weather (yes, I'll bitch about the humidity, but really, I've come to LOVE summer!), or the fact that my health is finally improving, but I'm feeling really good today. Still on the tired side, but good.

I'm willing to bet its some kind of combination of all the above, and not too worried about how that combination breaks down.

Its going to be an exciting day.

~My computer is supposed to come today. I have been tracking it like a stalker online with the UPS tracking number, and as of 9:25 last night it was in Chicago, so it should show up sometime today at the office, which is where I had it sent because I want to be able to play with it right away and not have to wait till I get home. So not only will having a new computer be funfunfun, but....

~I can load my iTunes and iPod software onto it and start putting music on my iPod!!!! I have it charging now, to make sure it is in peak condition by the time the computer is here. I read and reread and rereread the manual on the el on the way to work this morning, so by the time I actually have to do this stuff I will feel like I've been doing it for years, and therefore significantly reduce the risk of seriously fucking something up. Oooh, the U2 iPod is so pretty and shiny! I'm amused, however, at the fact that all the paperwork/manuals, etc that come with it refer to the thing simply as "iPod". Not "the iPod", or "your iPod", but as if it is a proper name, like "Hi, meet iPod. iPod, meet Amy". I'm looking forward, as well, to having something to occupy my time on the long-ass bus ride out to the suburbs because....

~Tonight is my very last night of teaching in the 'burbs! I feel as if I should be sadder, but I'm so relieved that I finally made the break that I can't be sad. Besides, the one student I was really attached to I've had for five school-seasons now, and its time to pass her along, anyway. She's been fabulous, definitely one of my success stories- IMEA division Is, district orchestra, youth symphony, all sorts of accomplishments. I did get her a parting gift, though- her very own volume of Bach suites, which she will need and want and love for the rest of her life as a violist. I'm also- if I can quit dorking around on LJ and get to it- going to rip her a few of my viola CDs today. So its bittersweet, but really more sweet than bitter. Plus I have new toys to distract me from the saddness- ooooh, shiny object!!!

The not-so-good, the mixed, and the downright weird.....

I didn't mean to necessarily make this a separate post from the previous one, but its probably better that way, anyway, so I remember to keep this stuff separate from the good stuff and still remember to be happy in the good stuff.

~So I'm trying really hard to not avoid a specific conflict any more than I have, or any more than I have to, especially now that I have a little more energy, my health is up, and my time is freer. I don't know if it is going to actually be resolved- I'm not betting on it, but I have to at least put the effort behind it. At the very least, its the "responsible adult" thing to do. I hate it, but it needs to be done. I'm not good with conflict, but I'm learning a lot these days on how to deal with it. Its pretty serious conflict, too, involving major breaches of trust, which is some of the worst, in my book. I'm going to need a lot of prayers, candles, spells, holding in the light, and all that to accomplish this, I think. I'm not anticipating the conversation to be pleasant, nor am I anticipating it to actually put anything to right. I just know it has to happen.

~And as I'm thinking about that conflict, someone has come charging back into my life, full-speed ahead, it seems. We had a huge falling-out sometime a little over a year and a half ago- indeed, she had a falling-out with quite a few people in our sphere of friends- and while I and others were still reeling from the event, she kind of fell off the face of the earth. The biggest problem with the entire situation is that she and I had been extremely close, and had known each other for over thirteen years. Information filtered back to me slowly, through folks who were still in somewhat-contact with her that started bothering me, even though I was still quite angry with her. The more information I got, the more concerned I became, and I'm at the point that my being more than a little frightened for her definitely outweighs the negative feelings I had for her at the time. I mean, if I hadn't loved her so much to begin with, our falling-out would not have been so rough and the residual feelings so hurtful, and there is still, on some level, a great deal of love in there somewhere. I also made friends with someone through subdermalglow who, it turns out, knew her as well, before the falling-off-the-earth ocurred. It feels like things are starting to fall into place that we would actually come in contact again, and sure enough, last night when I got home I got a message that she had called me. I don't know how she got my number, as we had been out of contact for over six months when I moved. I have no fucking clue how to approach this, but it has certainly been landed squarely in my lap. Ball is in my court. I should serve it. Any of you who know what I'm talking about are free to give me your input on the matter, just please do it via email, and not comments on this page.

~So if life weren't complicated enough, I seem to be breaking out in some kind of rash. It started on the left side of my chest and a little on my face over the weekend, but it has since gone away from my face. It is now all freaking over my chest and shoulders, and starting on my back. I thought it might be acne at first, but 1)I don't have acne problems, 2)the dots are too tiny for acne, and 3) it itches. I put some aloe from our aloe plant on it, but it didn't help a whole lot. I might have to make a run to the store for some non-drowsy antihistamine. I don't know if it is spreading, or if it is just psychological, but my scalp is starting to itch, too. I don't think it is heat rash or a sun issue, even though I ran around outside in a tank top all weekend, only because I'm not prone to either. I haven't changed detergent, soap, shampoo or the like, either, and as far as I know I haven't eaten or drunk anything out of the ordinary, or introduced any other foreign chemicals to my lifestyle. I feel fine, otherwise. Weird.

(no subject)

Getting nervous because computer is not here yet, and I'm afraid it won't be delivered before I have to leave at 4:30...........