be prepared to travel in circles.....
Sep. 22nd, 2003 10:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
violachicOkay, where to start, where to start....
Well, about a year ago I started considering application to the Brethren Volunteer Service. I was determined that I wanted to leave in January, 2003 and take a two-year assignment somewhere overseas.
Well, as you can probably tell, that didn't happen.
A lot of things have happened between then and now, and I pushed it back several times for a plethora of reasons. I finally decided that I had a lot of things on my own to figure out before I took off. Its kind of been on the back burner for about six months now.
But...
My mother called me yesterday afternoon after she got home from church. The first thing she said to me, and it came out really rushed, was "I was talking to Christy (our pastor), and we were talking about BVS, and they have a unit starting this Sunday and they're short of people and they'll take you on short notice if you call them tomorrow and tell them you want to be part of that orientation."
Whoa.
And for about a day I seriously thought of going.
In the end, I decided that getting loose ends together and picking up and leaving for what would probably be at least a year would cause far more stress than it would alleviate. But I gotta tell you, its been an intense thirty-six hours trying to make that decision.
What I have decided is that I'm going to renew my application for the January 2004 unit. I think that I've had so much time to think about it, and enough time to get my personal shit together that I think its time to go. I do think, however, that I may opt for the one-year domestic assignment rather than the two-year overseas.
But I think its where I belong right now. It embodies a lot of what I'd like to do with my life anyway, and it seems to be one of those environments where they do everything they can to make sure everyone really thrives.
I gotta do this. Don't let me make excuses or back out or find reasons not to. DON'T! I'm scared as hell about it. Not that this is any different from the rest of my life. The difference here is, I'm scared as hell about the future, instead of being stuck in a rut of being scared as hell about my present. I can either let my life play out in the same-old-same-old its been for the last four years, or I can do something proactive.
Besides, my goal is to save the world, right?
Well, about a year ago I started considering application to the Brethren Volunteer Service. I was determined that I wanted to leave in January, 2003 and take a two-year assignment somewhere overseas.
Well, as you can probably tell, that didn't happen.
A lot of things have happened between then and now, and I pushed it back several times for a plethora of reasons. I finally decided that I had a lot of things on my own to figure out before I took off. Its kind of been on the back burner for about six months now.
But...
My mother called me yesterday afternoon after she got home from church. The first thing she said to me, and it came out really rushed, was "I was talking to Christy (our pastor), and we were talking about BVS, and they have a unit starting this Sunday and they're short of people and they'll take you on short notice if you call them tomorrow and tell them you want to be part of that orientation."
Whoa.
And for about a day I seriously thought of going.
In the end, I decided that getting loose ends together and picking up and leaving for what would probably be at least a year would cause far more stress than it would alleviate. But I gotta tell you, its been an intense thirty-six hours trying to make that decision.
What I have decided is that I'm going to renew my application for the January 2004 unit. I think that I've had so much time to think about it, and enough time to get my personal shit together that I think its time to go. I do think, however, that I may opt for the one-year domestic assignment rather than the two-year overseas.
But I think its where I belong right now. It embodies a lot of what I'd like to do with my life anyway, and it seems to be one of those environments where they do everything they can to make sure everyone really thrives.
I gotta do this. Don't let me make excuses or back out or find reasons not to. DON'T! I'm scared as hell about it. Not that this is any different from the rest of my life. The difference here is, I'm scared as hell about the future, instead of being stuck in a rut of being scared as hell about my present. I can either let my life play out in the same-old-same-old its been for the last four years, or I can do something proactive.
Besides, my goal is to save the world, right?
