Viola Joke-of-the-Day
Aug. 21st, 2003 12:20 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
violachicQ:What instrument do violists envy most?
A:The harp. You only ever have to play pizzicato on open strings.
Q:What's another name for viola auditions?
A:Scratch lottery.
Q:What is the difference between a violist and a prostitute?
A1:A prostitute knows more than two positions.
A2:Prostitutes have a better sense of rhythm.
Q:What is the similarity between a violist and a prostitute?
A:Both are paid to fake climaxes.
Q:How do you get a dozen violists to play in tune?
A1:Shoot 11 of them.
A2:Shoot all of them.
A3:Who the hell wants a dozen violists?
Q:What's the latest crime wave in New York City?
A:Drive-by viola recitals.
A:The harp. You only ever have to play pizzicato on open strings.
Q:What's another name for viola auditions?
A:Scratch lottery.
Q:What is the difference between a violist and a prostitute?
A1:A prostitute knows more than two positions.
A2:Prostitutes have a better sense of rhythm.
Q:What is the similarity between a violist and a prostitute?
A:Both are paid to fake climaxes.
Q:How do you get a dozen violists to play in tune?
A1:Shoot 11 of them.
A2:Shoot all of them.
A3:Who the hell wants a dozen violists?
Q:What's the latest crime wave in New York City?
A:Drive-by viola recitals.
